Dear Nostalgia Critic,
I have watched your show for years and although you don’t know me, I know a great deal about you in a totally non-stalker-ish way (seriously).
Your return is welcomed and celebrated among your ever-loving totally non-stalker fan(s).
envy admire your work ethic and more importantly your fame for me to cash in dedication in bringing quality shows and episodes on Channel Awesome.
To show my appreciation, I will shamelessly link your video under the guise of a lesson to current and future writers out there in hopes to earn your admiration. And possibly offering me a job after seeing my absolute brilliance with words and potential to make great jokes in order to save me from a life of reading boring journals and writing about things no one in their right mind will read unless they are held at gunpoint.
Or you will be so touched by my stories that you’ll have no choice but to hire me.
If none of these reasons are convincing enough, then I’m afraid I have no choice but to use my ultimate-Batman-utility-belt-card-type to persuade you to make the right choice. I have an amazing skill that takes years to master which only few can boast about in the world today.
I can do your taxes.